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Saturday, August 23, 2014

The Method, when using public toilets

In the interest of public health safety, I am finally writing and explaining about "the method". I call out countless friends of mine who continue to use public toilets and carelessly sit on the bowl during their break to take a dump (variants exist, poop, squat, defecate, crap, shit may be use to replace dump), without using "the method." Well, I can't stand it anymore. 

If you are germaphobes, this blog is not for you, most probably, you will not be using public toilets.  If your true germaphobes and diagnosed with OCD, your probably reading this from a super clean personal laptop, this blog is also not for you, and you might need medical help or intervention.  If you have disposable toilet covers, use that of course and stop reading now. This is not for environmentalists as this can be call out as wasting too much paper (but in the interest of public safety, I can argue that this is not wasting paper). This is not for individuals who have TOTO toilets at home, seriously, if you have TOTO technology at home, why use public toilets and frankly speaking the rest of the toilet bowls in the market pale in comparison. This is also not for individuals who are suffering or about to suffer or will be suffering from explosive diarrhea since it takes 1-2 minutes to set this up if your a novice. By the time you've employ the method, feces would be all over the place. However, with constant use and practice, the method can be accomplish in as little as 10 seconds, I know, I have use "the method" for years. 

 Step 1: Open the toilet cover, wipe the surface once or twice to remove the dirt, remnant feces, or mist (TOTO design toilet bowl doesn't produce mist when you flush) Some public toilets have anti-bacterial solutions  that you can use to wipe the toilet bowl.

Step 2: Cover the top edge of the toilet bowl with just enough toilet paper.

Steps 3 & 4: Cover the right and left edges of the toilet bowl (just enough toilet paper, with practice, you'll get the proper length). Remember not too use in excess.

Step 5: Cover the lower edge of the toilet bowl (this 5th step is optional for female, but a must for male, you'll find out why)

Step 6: Don't forget to flush (courtesy flush also if possible) and remove the toilet paper on top of the bowl as courtesy to the next user.

The method gets harder to accomplish if there is a revolving electric fan or air blower within the bathroom/W.C./Toilets. Nevertheless, it is still doable.

To consult about courtesy flush, check the previous blogs:

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